Everything is dark now,
though, I don’t know
if I’m alone.
The walls around me
are strong… determined—
those walls are going places.
They’re special, you know.
Just wait until they show…
they’re gonna change the world.
No more suffering.
No more pain
or poverty, mundaneness
the same.
I want to be the same
as you,
but I’ve got work to do.
I can feel
the floor
caving in around me.
How long have I been
grounding
to try to feel
human again?
Most days,
I only feel
like what surrounds me.
I reach for the ceiling
and it’s not there.
The stars are the limit,
young one,
and you are so special.
You have so much potential…
so much potential
to climb.
And look around you,
the walls are beginning
to enclose.
Grounded and trapped
or reaching and free?
Reach for it,
you are a star.
It’s who you are…
it’s who you are.
Why are you crying
Again
Tell me
Why are you not
Grateful
for what God’s provided.
Now climb
or die
like everyone else
And don’t look back.
Don’t you dare look back.
Wipe those tears
so you can see
all the happiness
that surrounds
me
you make me
so happy
why aren’t you
happy
why aren’t you
me
I slip.
And the pain of falling
is the best
I’ve felt in years.
I can feel
I can feel again
Pain and suffering
surrounds me
as the walls
close in
the ground breaks
my fall
and I quickly realize
that it is dirt
I scoop it with my fingers
and it settles in my palm
I can feel it
I can feel
my tears mix in
and it creates something
beautiful
something messy
and I scrape off
all the longing of god
and allow my flesh
to reunite with its home
The mud cakes onto
every crevice
of my existence
no pure spot
left spared
and it’s there
and I’m there
covered in dirt
I am
Dirt
And I smile
through the tears
And I realize
that for all those years
I believed
my home was in the light
that through every strife
I had to fight
So with busted knuckles
and a bruised ego,
I gave in to myself
and accepted it all
the joys, the pain,
the light, the dark, the greys
And in that moment
I heard the breaking of glass
Had I done it?
Had I reached the stars?
Then,
something engulfed me
lifting me from the ground.
I am flying
I am flying not up
but out
And I feel
my legs scrape
something broken
something sharp
but it’s lovely and true
And I breathe
And I breathe
And the light surrounds me
as I take in my new scene
we are all but weeds
pollinating in the breeze
And the broken bell jar
fades from my existence
and so do the faces
that were always
looking in